therealxNightSkyx

it might seem like forever but

2009-08-05T20:40:00.000-07:00

Honestly it just ain't long enough...

So here I am thinking it's been longer since I've updated my blog, seven months.... not sooo bad ;)

Yesterday seven months had gone by since my last update and a lots been changing. I've had me some rough months and I've also had some great and happy ones too! Most important my day by day has brought me to.. TODAY. Today, tomorrow, and forever is looking brighter. These rough times have been a challenge for me and I've worked my way though them, it has made me stronger in ways. Thank God that I've been able to have really helpful and supportive friends along the way. We all need some body there for us. It's the best feeling in the world when you know you have people behind you that are genuinely hoping for your success in life. I thank each and everyone of you that has been there to help me out with much needed support.

And with these past seven months I've worked on getting my own car that I need to get to school, I've enrolled for Fall 09 classes!, and flying free. I'm excited and scared all at the same time but I know what I'm working towards and know if I keep on pushing hard towards my goals I can make it happen!!! Work hard, prepare myself, get ahead, and learn the tricks of the trade! I can do it, YOU can do it, Yay!
Staying positive, believing in yourself even when no one else does can be a challenge but in the end it can take you far!

This whole week I've noticed with all these accomplishment I'm much more relaxed, and I give off a happy cheery energy. :) When I'm at work and have a smile on my face the customers love it and so do I because I know it's a true expression. When I come across those that have a not so great aura about them I feel bad for them because I know thing can get better for them I'm just not sure if they can see that for themselves.

What I'm trying to say is when life throws at you some nasty, depressing, spirit draining twists and turns you just look up, face forward, and look to the bright side of it all. Work it out piece by piece and step by step.

When I turned 18 I was a little depressed about were I was "in life". My friends had their licence, car and had their college all picked out. I was eying the college I wanted to attend, not knowing how I'll pay for it. And by this point I'd already found out I'd would be doing it on my own dime. The Lic & car were also own my own kind of thing. Being a "go getter" I managed to find me a better paying job so I could save, save, save! Took me two years but I did it! Even after those two years I faced some life challenges. Some times thing just work themselves out on their own time schedule but don't let that stop you from reaching your goals.

Good news is now I'm getting started on my next goal... College!
Plus I'm working on becoming a better person because I know we all could be a little better deep down inside ;) nothing wrong about that. I'm loving it!

If my parents wont tell me their proud of me, I at least know I'm proud of me! You should be proud of all YOUR accomplishments in life too, whether you got their with your hard work and/or with the help of others that support you. Just BE PROUD OF YOU!!

I love life because with everyday you have the chance to prove to yourself you are a great person and want to make thing account to your goals while helping others do the same!

In a daydream….

2009-01-04T15:58:00.000-08:00

In a daydream present time is lost.. my thoughts are filled with the images of you. My mind, body, and soul is sent out to this place in my head where we are one free and happy. I daydream and time passes with delay…. but then I’m sent back with out warning! I close my eyes in hopes that perhaps you’ll return to my once uninterrupted daydream.

I awake hoping that somehow we can engage in each others company. Happy to be in one another’s presents.

Simply happy to be in each others arms, happy to feel the warmth as our skin touches and the feel of your loving lips.

this time of year

2008-12-24T18:59:00.000-08:00

I hope that all of you all have wonderful plans this year for the holidays. I know times are a little rough this Christmas/insert the rest of the holidays < and I know for me things could be better. But just remember all that you have and know that as 2008 comes to a close and 2009 fast approaches know friends and loved one's are the one thing money can't buy. Spend time with the ones you hold dear to your heart. Take a moment before the year is tough to tell those that matter most to you that you care and you are 100% happy to have them in your life. Because let's face it you can buy all the right gift but you just can't wrap up what matters most!

Thank you to everyone special in my life and all my friends you can never be bought.

i love you all in that special way
<3

xnight

just saying

2008-12-17T23:09:00.001-08:00

2008-11-17T23:06:00.000-08:00

The difficulties you meet will resolve themselves as you advance. Proceed & light will dawn & shine with increasing clearness on your path.
- D'Alembert

weekend

2008-10-19T22:20:00.000-07:00

October 17-19, 2008

Well I had a very busy and fun weekend, got out of the house and did everything I wanted to.

Friday night I went to my friend’s birthday part and have a good time looking up at the stars (what little we could see over here in Vegas) and checking out the moons surface though the telescope, then relaxed on porch swing.

Saturday went to Bite of Las Vegas and saw Lenka perform :) got my face painted (stars of course). Went down the inflatable slide for one dollar lol and went on this ride that spun you around and around really fast upside down and sideways locked up in cage! Craziness! Got some free ZizZazz this energy powder that's really good. Then went to get eat some really good vegan food at India Oven an Indian Restaurant. Yummmm it was my first time going to an Indian restaurant and I liked it! Then my friends and I headed over to Pool Sharks to break some racks, I won twice :) It was lots of fun!

Sunday afternoon headed over to the mall with a friend to cast my early vote! Happy I got it done. I couldn't vote on an empty stomach so we went to Pei Wei and had me some veg. spring rolls and veg. spicy noodles with Mandarin orange tea. Oo I bought “Veganomigon The Ultimate Vegan Cookbook”, in hopes that I wake up one morning and become the best vegan cook for myself. I love creating new dishes and I want to learn the basics in order to learn all the different combinations. Then on the way home I stopped by the market to get me a late dinner.

That pretty much sums up my weekend, happy I got to spend it with some of my friends.

by the way

2008-10-06T21:01:00.000-07:00

I wounder about the people that pass me by, what is their drive? What is their motivation? Are they just like looking for that one? Do they crave something more in life like I do? I'm sure they feel more or less the same but what is it that make it their own motive? What is it in their day to day that keep them going?

RT (random thought) - sis moved out yet again, this time without saying bye..

On the bus ride home I was feeling a bit down. I just felt like crying. Yes I know what you're thinking emo me, pms me, but it maybe more then that.. it just sucks feeling so down. The day passes and I feel silly for having such low thoughts. Because over the years I've learn to be a bit more positive and look for the light of things but day by day slowly a shadow can cast over it all. I love what I have, I'm grateful for lots but still that doesn't mean I don't even feel depressed.

“Every man is his own doctor of divinity in the last resort” - Robert Louis Stevenson

And with that I remind myself that even when you feel so alone you always have yourself to turn to. Look deep and remind yourself these thoughts are only temporary.

I was thinking of one of my old friends today that I no longer talk to because of a fall out. Then coming home I saw her drive by her old neighbourhood as I walked by. She slowed down to wave so I waved back, it was nice to see her happy.

RT- listening to music can be so therapeutic

RT- fin allergy's suck. I've had this sinus headache all day :( major ouch

RT-inconsiderate people, bitches, unorganized people, and people in a hurry just blow my mind!!

absent

2008-09-24T23:37:00.000-07:00

Bliss the day, bliss the night, bliss the world and all it’s bright

Consumed are we with greed and lust

Look inward, look out

I gather my thoughts and I exhale the past

Bright Lights

The sun, she shines

The stars they glow

The moon he lights up the dead of night

Remember what you do today affects your future. If you don’t want it in future don’t do it in the present. The out come can be greater then the day itself. Actions do speak louder then words. Actions are the past, present, and future of your life.

September 9 2008 1:20AM

2008-09-09T21:23:00.000-07:00

I want to run and keep running, graze every inch of the earth

I want to feel the wind blowing in my hair

I want to touch the cold blades of grass

I want to tilt my head back to feel the tiny drops of rain fall onto my skin

Let me go, let me feel, let me live

Like running water I want flow across the land & take in the sun & feel the earth that I live on; never forgetting that the earth is a beautiful place

respect its beauty

I want to be drunk on nature

Taking in all that was meant to be seen

The sand, the rocks, the stones, the mountains, the rivers, the lakes, the oceans the flowers, the bushes, the trees, the animals

ALL THE COLORS ALL THE FLAVORS AND ALL THE TEXTURES

The earth is rich with nature

I want to absorb all I can and savor the flavors of the earth

I want to tastes the world and its sweet wine & herbs

vampire heart

2008-08-26T21:11:00.000-07:00

Blood ….
Love….
Red…
Forever…
Love…
Eternity..
Dream…
Sky…
Everlasting…
Forever…
Blood…
Beauty...
Devine….

Beautiful On the Inside and Out

2008-07-30T23:53:00.000-07:00

Beauty walks alone
So unhappy
Beauty know the pain of solitude
Knows the gloom of waking up beside no one
When you close your eyes and imagine the great gift in life,
To be able to share those moments of life with someone that you know undoubtedly completes your every being

A wonderful soul is left to be with out comfort of another
Unable to find the one

When love is you’re every wish
To find one that consumes your whole heart
Some one to have and to hold

Beauty holds onto memories past
To retrace faded affection, dreaming about a new day

For now
The clouds stain the sky, rain soaks the earth and the sun is casted away.

Beauty walks alone but forgets not

Affection, Devotion, and Passion

7/26/08 7:51pm

2008-07-26T21:39:00.000-07:00

THE NIGHT is

coming....

forget

2008-07-25T20:18:00.000-07:00

i look down

i look up

i stare deep

i stare long

i foces on the good

i forget the wrong

i taste a tear

that runs down my check

i look back down

only to look back up

three am

2008-07-22T03:10:00.000-07:00

morning slowly wakes
the stars fade away
the night has past
the morning is due
staring out the window to catch the first gimps of its light
hiding behind my eyes
wishing for the next phase of the moon
hoping to rest my thoughts
the morning brings me hope
the day leaves me somber
to wish is to hope, to hope is to dream
the xnight will come
the stars will shine